Twitter world is *not* the real world.

the more time I spend on Twitter, the more I'm convinced people think it works like the real world. it does, but in a worse way than the real world does. and I think that's possible. people need validation and their egos stroked in real life, but it seems like on Twitter the desire to be liked, in the case of some of the more difficult cases, the desire to hear the sycophantic cries of your followers, is magnified to ridiculous proportions.

I've regarded Twitter as a useful tool b/c it's like Facebook and AOL IM rolled into one. (if anyone like me is still around out there that remembers what AOL IM was.) you can use it to tell people what you're doing, and if you're into music, what music turns you on and what you're listening to at the moment.

this afternoon I made a factual (so what I considered a completely unincendiary) statement about the absence of Steve Lamacq from 6music this week. a good majority of my followers don't listen to 6music as much as I do (or even listen to it at all) so I was stating the fact that Andrew Collins was subbing for him while he is in Brooklyn on quasi holiday, quasi work trip, and with Collins in for Lammo, the show isn't the same. Lammo is an indie music cheerleader of sorts, whereas Collins is a comedian (I recall him going to Edinburgh Fringe quite a lot?) / lit chap these days. it's like comparing apples to oranges. the show is bound to be different when you've got a different presenter.

Radcliffe/Maconie suffers a similar fate when one of them is out and the other must present solo, and the Mark Radcliffe fans love it when Stu is away, b/c he plays more indie-ish (?) stuff from what I can gather? and the Stuart Maconie fans like me are chomping at the bit when Mark is away, b/c Stu gets away with playing more Northern soul, and he tends to flirt with his female guests and generally be adorable (haha).

"one of the things is not like the other" is something we learned from Sesame Street, right?

somehow Mister Collins took my comment of "I miss Lammo. no offence to @CollingsA but drivetime isn't the same (:" as a personal slight. had I said, "Collins, you suck!" or "Andrew Collins should never be allowed to host drivetime, evah!" I could see he would have a decent argument for being upset. to a certain degree. in any event, he thought I was dissing him.

what's even loonier about the whole thing is that Collins must have been looking up his @replies to have found my Tweet in the first place. I'm sure Mister Big UK Media doesn't follow an inconsequential person like me, so that's the only way he could have found it. my guess is that it must have been a really slow night in London and with nothing to do, he went fishing for compliments through his @replies or possibly (and quite masochistly?) was looking for complaints into his second day of subbing for Lammo.

unfortunately, he found the Tweet and decided it was grounds for (minor) war. he said something to me that I regarded as a bit of a threat, saying I shouldn't say things on Twitter I wouldn't say to his face. ok, so you tell me, what part of "I miss Lammo. no offence to @CollingsA but drivetime isn't the same (:" is hateful? I don't see it. I'm not an arsekisser *and* I'm a fan and friend of Lammo's so the last thing I'm going to say to any of his substitute presenters is "you're so wonderful, I love it when Lammo is away and you can fill in for him!" b/c I don't think that.

apparently, I was supposed to be sensitive to the fact that Andrew Collins might misconstrue a statement of fact as a dig at him. and oh yeah, he said I needed to learn Twitter etiquette and not use his Twitter handle in my Tweets so he won't read them and get upset. ummm...WTH?

I ended up deleting the Tweets because I just don't have time to deal with any rabid Collins fans coming after me with a pitchfork. some of my followers who also follow him have told me they read the exchange and either laughed and/or shook their heads at what happened.

the man has 10,000+ followers. if he feels the need to go after an innocent comment someone made stating a preference for a favourite presenter on a threatened radio station, that's pretty stupid.

a couple weeks back I wasn't allowed to have an opinion. now I'm not allowed to state facts. Twitter just keeps getting more interesting. (ha!)

FYI this whole thing ended up confirming what I already knew: I prefer Lammo above all others :)

(oh yeah, and I *still* think that Foals track sounds like Doves.)

edit 24 Mar 2010, 9:30 AM: he's still going on about Twitter etiquette. is there such a thing? this is pretty weird. it's like having the Emily Post of Twitter come back at you and tell you you've made a social gaffe.

dunno, I suppose I should be grateful that he slightly backpedaled on his previous vitriolic Tweets to me.

CollingsA
@theprintedword Not offence at comment, offence at etiquette failure re: using someone's Twitter name when you needn't have done

he wanted to make the point that any Tweet containing his name should be praise and nothing else? dunno. if you're expecting Twitter to deliver only compliments to your desktop / mobile phone / electronic gadget of your choice, I think you're missing the point of Twitter completely. it's a great equalizer b/c anyone with access to the internet can post whatever's on their mind, whenever they want. I wonder what his thoughts are on all the recent "comments" made about Director-General Thompson.